To be loved. By herself.

I know a girl who changed my life.


She was a little girl from a misty, unknown village in the mountains, the sky closer to her than any other friend she had. She was never alive nor dead either, she was simply floating by time, as if this was her deliberate fate; always be the one in between.


She never recognized the blurry reflection in the mirror, it was so much easier to turn away from the face she never really knew. Closing her eyes was her way to forget, to not see the moon glistening hopefully, calling for her to sleep in its vigilant arch of light. Incomprehensible how things that lived by night could ever be her allies. She was once taught that only villains held on to the darkness as if it was their home.


She then wondered – who am I? When people would sleep, she would be awake, as if guarding something she was afraid to let go. She too lived in the nightly shade, but she was no criminal and her heart never wished to hurt anyone. These stories on wrong or right that were once told carried a absurdity that struck her deeply when she let her thoughts dwell on their meaning.


So many guidelines to life, it was impossible to live it. These well-organised rules, they were the pinches she felt every time she would be called different from everybody else. No one was invited to earth without a destiny, yet some would never find out who they were ought to be. Deep down, she knew, but her eyes and mouth had run dry with tears and cries.


But the deepest treasures lie within those who have been hurt the most, as if life tries to compensate – and this girl was the one who would give back to others what she never had, a love and care so beautiful it would change other people’s lives. She would sing fragile lullabies and help mend the tears of those who lay by her side.


And eventually, her eyes shall open even by night. She’ll kiss the stars goodnight with a smile, knowing she found herself by helping others find themselves too. Through music, through words, through a quest of determination and one indestructible dream – to be loved. By herself.



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