No questions or screams ever left my throat, whilst he softly caressed my hair with feathery fingertips.
It was another hopeless ending to another endless day and I didn’t feel restrained to now fall into the ruthless hands of a murderer. Maybe it was what I had been looking for. Danger, death, anything that would break apart the pieces of my life that were cutting through me like an army of razorblades.
I was ready for defeat, my frail body joining the asphalted ground of an alley that lead to corners of the city where muffled screams and gunshots never slept.
The begging of my mind to be freed from its painful memories once and for all must have touched my voice with audible words, my pleas making his gorgeous eyes squint.
I silenced as a sob climbed up his throat and crawled through his lips like a tortured animal.
Crystal hints of his skin melted into the air, his silhouette becoming transparent as drops of silvery, shiny water fell from his dark eyes. A ghostly delusion, an image that was born from my infected mind.
I was convinced I had lost all sanity, seeing and feeling this boy who couldn’t really be here.
Then he fell down on his knees in front of me like I had in front of him, imitating my howling cries whilst resting his delicate hand on my cheek, a touch that felt like a ray of sunlight in a cloudy world, a heartbeat thumping against a dead chest, so soothing, so full of love.
Love. If love would have a face, it would be his.
“I’ve lost my wings, I couldn’t take care of you, I’m so sorry, I couldn’t take care of you,” he whispered words only I could understand.
The past years, I had been through things that had awoken my craving to die. All I had tasted up till this moment I met my guardian dear, was failure and loneliness.
Everything faded when I heard his grievous voice. For the first time, I looked my own broken heart in the eyes and I desperately wrapped my arms around him to keep him and myself from dying there and then.
“d-don’t cry, you don’t…don’t need your wings,” I stuttered, stroking his strong back carefully. He felt like a porcelain doll in my arms. My forgotten superhero.
“Then how can I protect you? How can I guard you?” he bent his head and I could see rivers of sadness washing away the small alley that decorated our sights.
“Walk beside me, you don’t need to fly…Just walk beside me and don’t ever leave,” I told him and his sobs silenced at ones.
I soothed my own guardian angel, my porcelain doll, my broken heart.
This first encounter, it never stopped. Since that evening, he’s been walking beside me, invisibly to others, but crystal clear to me.
He is my heart, I am his body. He is my angel, I am his halo.
He lost his wings because I had lost my faith in him. You should see the smile on his face now they’re growing back.
He is my guardian dear and I will never give up on him anymore.
I will never give up on myself anymore.
I believe that somehow, we should all believe in guardian angels…Don’t ever give up on yourself ♥ There’s always someone or something beautiful to live for. xoxo